“Denial” has traditionally been conceptualized as an ego defense mechanism. But disordered characters use denial as a tactic to feign innocence, and to manipulate and manage the impression of others who might otherwise have their number.

Disordered characters are forever blaming their misbehavior on someone or something else, and skilled manipulators can make you think that somehow it’s your fault that they did whatever they did to hurt you.

When manipulators rationalize, they’re mostly trying to manage your impression of them, trying to convince you that they meant no harm, had no choice, or did what any reasonable person would do in order to mislead you about the nature of their intentions and their character.

Like most disturbed characters, manipulators are skilled liars. Most people, however can’t understand why such people lie so much, especially when it seems to serve no purpose.

In prior posts, I’ve written about some of the major differences between neurotic personalities and disordered characters (they differ on such major issues as anxiety, shame, guilt, and conscience).  You can read more of these comparisons as part of a series I’m doing for another blog.  That series began with a post that pointed out the failure of traditional [...]